Matter of Misunderstandings

"It was really tiring how I end up being like a slave in this house without no one even knowing. I was a slave on my own self, for my family and for my friends. They haven't realized how much I have been through and how tough things happen to me. It's just not fair."

I haven't done anything wrong! I mean, what's wrong of chatting up with a friend that is a boy? What is wrong of answering back if you are questioned? What's wrong of saying what you feel if you are asked to? What's wrong of pouting if you are really upset?! Was there anything else you want to add? Would you like to ground me forever once you know I have this blog and let people know everything that happens to my life?! It WASN'T fair! Everyday of my life, I tend to hear my friends talking about how good and how open their mothers talk about personal things. They deal with it as closest of friends, not minding what people say. But me, unluckily, I haven't got any mother that would talk about this things. They didn't even know who I am! I am so tired being judge around. I am so tired of having been neglected and having been teased as a crying baby whenever like to express myself. I am tired of shouting at my brother's face each time he messes up my life. I am tired of hiding things which other teenagers are free to do. It's just so tiring because it happens all over again! I am tired of being so worried about myself if I have this kind of sickness which unfortunately, I don't know! It's just not better! It's so hard of just getting myself into lies which I know eventually, will appear and then make my life miserable again. I don't want to be judged. I don't want to be alone. I don't want to keep this things to myself. I didn't want to feel happy outside because I know there is something going on. I don't want to pretend I am such a happy girl, singing preppy songs in the middle of the street! I am so tired! I am so TIRED!